Moose

DIRTY JOKE: Golfer Phil Mickelson in Newfoundland
DIRTY JOKE: Golfer Phil Mickelson in Newfoundland

On his way to a golf tour in Newfoundland , Phil Mickelson drives his new Ford Fusion into a gas station in a remote part of town.

 

The pump attendant, obviously knows nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Newfoundland manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is.

 

“How’s she cuttin’ by ,” says the attendant.

 

Phil nods a quick ‘hello, ‘ and bends forward to pick up the nozzle.

 

As he does so, two tees fall out of his shirt pocket onto the ground.

 

”What are dose?” asks the attendant.

 

”They’re called tees,” replies Phil.

 

”Well, what on God’s earth are dey fur ?” inquires the attendant..

 

”They’re for resting my balls on when I’m driving”, says Phil.

 

‘F****n Jaysus ,” says the Newfoundlander, ”Ford tinks of everyting !”

What’s Going On

ac1d0689-dfbe-41a7-8816-dbbe0e3223bc_560_420-question marks

Which Morning Moose Show Member are you?

Which Morning Moose Show Member are you?

Variety - The Children's Charity

Donate to Variety

Variety—The Children’s Charity—is dedicated to improving the lives of underprivileged, at-risk & special needs children throughout Iowa.

Morning Moose Categories

Ask Amy 16 Articles

Blog 568 Articles

Interviews 370 Articles

Monday Mancard 2 Articles

Moose On Demand 477 Articles

Stupid News 348 Articles

Videos 172 Articles

Contact the Morning Moose

Moose on Demand

IMG_1371

Iowa Nice Guy Announces Run For Governor

Iowa Nice Guy Announces Run For Governor

Newton vs Newton

Newton vs. Newton

Newton vs. Newton

royalspitcher

World Series Preview

World Series Preview

This combo of 2014 file photos shows Iowa Democratic senatorial candidate, Rep. Bruce Braley, left, and Republican senatorial candidate State Sen. Joni Ernst. Iowa is a state with a relatively small number of veterans and no military bases, yet the hotly contested Senate race here is heavily focused on the military. The recent scandals surrounding veterans' health care and the air strikes against Islamic State militants in Iraq mean the troops are on people's minds. (AP Photo)

Negative Political TV ads: Round 2

Negative Politcal TV ads: Round 2

FILE - In this Oct. 2, 2014 file photo, Josh McDermitt, a cast member in the television series "The Walking Dead," poses at a special screening for season five of the show in Universal City, Calif. The series returns for another season on Sunday, Oct. 12, at 9 p.m.

“The Walking Dead’s” Josh McDermitt

“The Walking Dead’s” Josh McDermitt