I’m like a Christmas tree when you talk to me because I light up.

Are you a lawyer? Because I think you might be looking for a Mrs. Clause.

Want a gift? Because my best toys run on batteries.

Let me help you out of that ugly sweater.

How about I shimmy down your chimney tonight?

Let’s make this a not-so-Silent Night.

Let’s both be naughty and save Santa the trip tonight.

Let’s pretend to be presents and get laid under the tree.

Are you ornaments? Because I want you all over my tree.

You’re the first gift I want to unwrap on Christmas morning.