Little Billy came home from school to see the family’s pet rooster dead in the front yard. Rigor mortis had set in, and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air.

When his Dad came home, Billy said, “Dad, our rooster’s dead, and his legs are sticking in the air. Why are his legs sticking in the air?”

His father, thinking quickly, said, “Son, that’s so God can reach down from the clouds and lift the rooster straight up to heaven.”

“Gee, Dad, that’s great,” said little Billy.

A few days later, when Dad came home from work, Billy rushed out to meet him yelling, “Dad, Dad! We almost lost Mom today!”

“What do you mean?” Dad asked.

“Well, Dad, I got home from school early today and went up to your bedroom, and there was Mom flat on her back with her legs in the air, screaming, “Jesus, I’m coming, I’m coming!” If it hadn’t been for Uncle George holding her down, we’d have lost her for sure!”